Scarlet Letter..

Written in a jiffy, just to prove a point, but apt enough to earn a place in my heart.
From Someone....To the one whom I thought of as "THE ONE"

My Dearest,

I won’t take much of your time
Knowing that it is precious.
Too precious for my letter,
And for me, for that matter.
But few things need to be said.
Firstly, I need to thank you.
Thank you for coming
In my life, and befriending me.
You made me look forward to
All our meetings.
Thanks for that.
I thank you for all
The memories you left me with:
When they come back to me
They still make me smile.

Now, do I need to thank you
For going away from me?
For moving to a remote place
Where I can never reach.
If you want, I can
Thank you for that too; you know
If you want I could’ve done
Anything, for you.

Now, I say sorry.
For failing to live up
To your expectations; you know
Living by others’ expectations
Has never been my strong point.
Sorry, for all those times
When I needlessly came up
To talk to you; you know
My heart wants relations.
Sorry again for failing
To be the man you wanted.

If someday, you need me,
I am still there for you
Just where you had left me.

To this, I sign off.
So long, my dearest.

Ever yours

-------------------------------------------------------

Thank you Satyaki Dasgupta . And sorry for not informing you.

Ishaqzaade....

Love is life. Even more maybe. That is what this movie professes, and with some conviction.
The introductory part of the movie will definitely leave a smile on your face as Director Habib Faisal pops up ingenuitive ideas at crucial intervals to keep you engaged through a slick and span screenplay, with ample twists and turns to keep you guessing, “what next?”

The story isn't exactly "different" but the presentation is definitely refreshing. The raw appeal of the movie also works at many different levels, be it the brilliantly choreographed “Chokra Jawaan” or the post-election firing spree.
The characters have been chalked out brilliantly by Faisal, true to his detailed style (eg. Do Dooni Chaar) and are truly endearing. Parma, the hot headed grandson of a Rajput patriarch with an angel of a mother and Zoya, the only daughter of the incumbent MLA who prefers Guns to Earrings are a match made in hell. The acting is pitch perfect as Parineeti Chopra and Arjun Kapoor slip effortlessly into the layered characters of Zoya and Parma. Arjun does full justice to his role while Parineeti does very well to give a domineering performance around an almost all-male cast.
The dialogues are raw and charming, besides being humorous on most parts.

The movie is a tad too fast in certain sections as the “falling-in-love” part is almost rushed through and one remains bothered whether love actually happens that fast. But once the initial jitters give away, u can’t help but love this awesome onscreen pairing of Zoya and Parma who remind you of cute memories from your own story.

The music, by Amit Trivedi, is outstanding. The quantity, quality and placement of the songs is in tune with the theme of the movie and Amit Trivedi proves his mettle yet again. “Pareshaan”, ”Aafaton Ke Parinde” and “Chokra Jawaan” were the best of the lot while “Jhalla Wallah” was a light hearted tune and “Ishaqzaade” an endearing melody.
The movie has political undertones which remain largely suppressed by the romantic saga of the leading couple and show an uncouth and barbarian side of our society.

The message at the end of the movie is, indeed, heart rendering and, the climax is unexpected, and will be liked by some, disliked by others but remembered by all.

Few movies and their characters refuse to leave you even long after you have left the theatre.
One of those movies, totally.

I'll Wait Forever...

It pained me a lot
It pains me still
Today i love you
Tomorrow i will.


My hope is true
And full and deep.
Did i go wrong
In this faithful leap?


I am left weak
I am left tired
This terrible defeat
Is fate conspired


You are YOU
And I am ME
I miss those days when
We were WE.


Bucket-load of tears
From my eyes.
Painful screams
Hopeless sighs


I had planned so much
It was good to see
But happiness and me?
Not to be.


It wasn't working for you
Or so had you said
Wish you thought with your heart
And not with your head.


We were perfect
I can still say
I'll keep trying
To get it that way


Love, hope, tears
Sprayed and showered
At night without you
My heart cowered


In my poems
The subject was you
In my heart
My love was true.


My love was enough
For two of our size
I'm waiting for the day
You wake up, realize.


Realize you will
And the moment you do
You'll find me waiting to say
I love you too....




INFINITY...............

Living Hell

“This Week Has Been, The BEST EVER” That is how my last post ended. And I meant every letter of it. It WAS the best week I had ever had. All of this sounds ironic now. Now that things have gone SO wrong. I wouldn’t have wondered much if anyone else would title this entry as “Worst Week Ever” if he was in a similar situation. But, I wont. Never.
I made a mistake, a silly one indeed, and paid the price. I was pushed right out of heaven into the burning fury of hell, and that too by someone, I could give my life for. And for the records, IT HURTS.

I have always heard, and believed, that “Good things happen to good people, always.” And every time I fall upon this line, I look up to heaven and say “Why me?” All I know is that I am a good person. Never cheated in an exam, never stolen from a friend, never hurt a soul (knowingly). Actually, as I used to tell my friends a little time back, “There is nothing I have done which I can’t tell my mother about fearlessly.” Explains my stand. “Why Me?”


Past 25 days, she owned me. Now, I’m like discarded trash. I used to wake up waiting for her SMS. I would give her a short, sweet call and head towards school. We’d meet at school, during the breaks mostly. I’d come home and would always find her SMS waiting for me “Call me up. J” And call her, I would. I’d text her after the call, and wait for her reply. The numerous intermittent spaces in between would feel like hours and would be spent studying (mostly). We would sneak small moments from our water-tight Class 12 schedule. This would go on till we had to study or either of us fell asleep. Those days were sweet. Very. I loved her voice. I loved US. I just hope that she did so too. I hadn’t dreamt for years before I met her. She made me dream. And how.


I still can’t get over her. Need proof? I don’t dream now. I have nightmares.



In those 25-odd days, she became a habit. She was the neatest piece of treble whisky and I was a oh-so-cravingly-thirsty alcoholic. I don’t get over people easily. I’m not the “move-on” types. Have tried it on a number of occasions with a number of people, but this time, I ain’t even trying, because I know, that I won’t be able to. Or rather, I just don’t want to.


This blog might never have been THIS personal. But today I am so emotionally broke that I sincerely don’t care what people think of me. All I can say is that I’m still paining. It’s reduced, considerably due to the overtly optimistic nature I possess but sometimes, reality does bring me down to earth and, it hurts again.



Now that she is gone, there is this gaping, scathing, searing hole, punched through me. The texts are gone. The calls aren’t half as close. It’s like I’m going through cold turkey. Maybe it wasn’t just a habit. It was an addiction. And I was an addict. The hole through my chest goes so deep that I can’t do anything apart from study. Good for me? I don’t know. Maybe if you want a dead-from-within-95%-scoring-zombie. Not what I want. I want her. No, I need her.


She said she wasn’t ready for this. She said she needed time. She said she needed space. I said I’d make sure she gets it all, and more. But she just didn’t need me. End-of-story.
Every cloud has a silver lining, and so does this one. We are still friends. We used to be good ones before it all started. I’ll have to make my castle all over again. All this for my Architectural ambitions. Hopefully I’ll make a real castle someday. One which will stand tall against the skyline. That would make me proud. Not happy. My happiness lies somewhere else, with someone else. And you, hopefully you read this. And when you do, please remember- P.S. I still love you…


:’(

Something Beautiful...

Millions are praying for it daily,
But just somehow, happiness chose me.
And though I can’t believe it still,
Something beautiful happened to me.

Poetry is just a medium,
A medium to express my soul.
Last week I was incomplete,
Now suddenly, I’m whole.

Chains and fetters bound me,
All of a sudden, I’m free.
I just found an angel,
Something beautiful happened to me.

Tonnes of songs, written and heard.
But cried and died, for your one word,
Pain will go, Joy will stay.
Forever, Truly, I’ll remember that day.

I was I, and You were You,
Before the day, we became We.
Believe it or not, actually,
Something beautiful happened to me.

To be happy now, I don’t need to try.
All credits involved, belong to you.
You are what, I’ll remember myself by.
Now that my dream, has actually come true.

Your wish, My command.
Was and will always be.
For you are, the very reason,
Something beautiful, happened to me.

Hope it always stays this way.
Wish this may, end never.
This week gone by, truly,
Has been THE BEST EVER.

P.S. I love you..

After 12 years of formal schooling, I have seen people meet, hate each other, like each other, love each other, get into a relationship, and then, unfortunately, get out of it. There is this friend of mine who “loved” a girl for two long years before he “got” her, then stayed together for a year and then, recently broke up. There is another friend of mine who hasn’t seen the girl he loves for 2 whole years but still insists that he does, and trust me HE DOES. Then I know girls who have hidden their feelings behind a smile for seasons together, just to see the guys they love happy. Love can be mushy, bittersweet, tiring, painful, etc. But it’s love, so never mind.

I had never been able to wrap my head around the entire concept of “love. But that was until, I met a couple.

When I do a bit of soul searching an ask myself “Why I thought of writing this?” I have but one reply, “Oh c’mon, they are perfect.”

This weekend, I met the perfect couple. PERFECT.

And when I asked them what love is all about, this is what they said:

”Love is something that makes one feel that life is perfect. One forgets all pains. One bears all troubles. One endures all storms. One does everything he can. One smiles. That’s the power of love.

It is like your life revolves around a central point. It is like you find the focus of your existence.

You wish you could be with them 24X7, 365, and you still want more of them. That's love.

You were having a rave party on the outskirts of the city and on your way home the police catches you drunk and driving, and right when you think that nothing can save you and you have screwed up big time, your sober friend on the passenger seat owns up and takes the blame, goes through a lot of trouble, while you stay free.
When in love, you want to be that ‘friend on the passenger seat’. That is love

You have Rs.5 as your cell phone balance and just because you want to hear her voice, you spend every penny you have (even go into negative balance) and don’t think about it once with regret. That’s love.

When you, dreamless for 5 years, see the face of the person of your dreams, in your dreams, standing barefoot in the sand, underneath a clear blue sky and her face lit up by the sun, its love.

When you feel twice as awkward as she does when you introduce her to your friends, it’s stupid, and it’s love.

When you promise something out of the way and then end up doing something out of the way just to ensure that you fulfill your promise, its love.

When you see a smile on the face of that special person, and you wish to hold on to that moment forever, its love.

When you are in the balcony, and the sky is twilight, and the moon has just started to shine bright, and you are on the phone with your special one, and you tell him "this is the best moment of the day" its love.

When you want to die immediately just because “I always wanted to die this happy” its love.

And when it is love, well, it is love”

Sounds great.
God Bless Us!!
;-)

*ting*.

Someone...

Well, this isn't my creation. This is what someone wrote about someone. And as soon as i read this, i knew that I was posting it here. What if it isn't mine? It's from the heart and, well, that's all that matters. To someone, wish i could write as well.

It’s the scariest thing ever to realize how much someone means to you. When it hits you, I mean really hits you, all these thoughts and questions rush through your head at once. A sad emotion even starts to creep on you slowly inch by inch as you start to wonder. What if for some reason things don’t work out? - How are you possibly going to live without them? Someone that was once a stranger, now is the only person you know like the back of your hand. Someone you once had no emotions for, now has the power to break your heart. Someone you never used to hang out with, now owns most of your time. Someone you never thought you’d care about, now owns your entire life. Someone you once lived without, you now wish to hold onto forever.

That Sinking Feeling

I walk for a minute,
It feels like a mile.
That sinking feeling
’s been around for a while.

Life is scattered;
Torn pages.
Somewhere within’
Fury rages.

Places and faces, zip me by.
Memories return, in the blink of an eye.
Move on, I must, and so I try.
And as I fail, I stop, and cry.

I cry out loud,
but then, no one hears.
This is worse
Than the worst of my fears.

I know not what,
Causes me grief.
Though it shouldn’t,
Pain brings relief.

You, me, us.
I can’t correlate.
My being suffers,
My soul suffocates.

A simmering storm,
Is in my mind.
Heart and soul
In perpetual grind.

In pain I stand,
Laughing away.
This sinking feeling,
It’s here to stay.